Sunday, January 31, 2010

1 Week On Lupron!

Ahh the joys of fake hormones! I am up and down and all around! :) Seems like I can get through the day and feel fairly normal (had a couple days with constant headaches but haven't noticed those as much the last couple days) but by the evenings it seems I am just spent and the grumpiness hits full force and I have to struggle to be civil! It's frustrating when I know that's not how I really feel but have no control whatsoever to change the way I'm feeling. I was trying to explain it to Kent. I usually tell him "we control how we feel" and then trying to explain "except when mommy is on evil hormones"!! :D

Yesterday was a nice day - we ran a bunch of errands and got a lot done, and I got to take Kent shopping for a couple new books at Barnes and Nobles and then some new Pokemon cards at Wal Mart (we exchanged a couple Christmas gifts so he had some "fun" money). Finally found a light bulb for his clip on lamp which has needed replacement for ages but I had to go to Home Depot to find it, it wasn't a "regular" bulb I was able to find at Wal Mart or Target. That was nice to get that checked off the list finally! We had to get Kent new frames too - he snapped his other ones in half! I knew we were going to have to get new ones this year anyway, and he's due for his exam in another month and a half and really I didn't spend any more getting these ones then I would with the insurance (with Lenscrafter's protection plan you only pay 50% so it wasn't that bad). The lenses are always the really pricey part anyway!

I am rambling this afternoon, just feeling chatty I guess. It feels good to be having a "good" day! I had SUCH a blast helping with my new 2-year old room at church today. I cannot tell you how much happiness it brought me just to play with a room full of 2 year olds for a little over an hour. I just adore them!! And it was awesome to get that reminder of just how trusting and sweet they are at that age too - I had originally thought I wanted to work with newborns, but this age is PERFECT! You can really get down on the ground and play with them but they're old enough to be able to communicate pretty well too, and they distract easily if they're upset about something! :) I loved when we went into the group singing/lesson how one of the little girls wanted to hold my hand the whole time and then crawled into my lap, just melted my heart!! Love them! :) It helped put me in a great mood! The sermon today was good too and then a few of us went out for lunch at La Tequila and I got a yummy veggie burrito which I enjoyed, I'm still stuffed full of tortilla chips I think! Kent and Johnny had fun (for the most part :D ) playing across the table and it was nice to hang out and have adult conversation for a little while! :)

I started cleaning up and have more to do but needed a little break. I really want a nap (I think the drugs are really zapping my energy level) but I might be having company in another hour and a half so I'm trying to get stuff ready just in case!

Time to get back to it!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Hoping to get a calendar soon!

I got a note from my IM that she's started her meds as well (her lupron started yesterday) and she mentioned it was going to be a "long cycle" so I think we're still aiming for last week of February, first week of March. I called and left RBA a message this morning to ask if a) "L" starting lupron means we have a calendar? b) since I started meds Monday is there anything I need to get scheduled, or just wait for instructions? c) can I get a refill on my lupron kit - I only have 3 syringes left?! I still feel totally relaxed about this cycle, and just have a big curiosity as to how it will go this time around! I have learned to expect nothing when it comes to IVF cycling, if something can go wrong it usually does but every now and then you get a pleasant surprise. :) I am hoping we are all pleasantly surprised this time around. I still cannot believe it's been going on 8 months since we matched. Time flies!

I am looking forward to church and seeing friends on Sunday and hoping we get to all go to Steele, AL (weather permitting) to watch some testing and tuning at the drag strip! I've never been and am excited, I really hope it warms up enough that the racetrack will be open!

Vicki & I got tickets for the circus on the 13th - to take Kent and Johnny, I am SO excited!! I really wanted to go last year but didn't fit it in. But this year we are - Kent has NEVER been to the circus and the last time I remember going I was younger than he is now! I have a vivid memory of getting a pretzel with mustard and the huge red tent, but don't remember much more than that. I showed Kent a preview video and he was so excited, he's going to love it!

I am still counting down to our mountain getaway trip in 3 more weeks exactly from today! I can't WAIT to get away for a little while and have a blast snow tubing and soaking in a hot tub and enjoying some beautiful mountain views! Yay! Lots of good things to look forward to in the coming months. :)

Friday, January 22, 2010

Meds on MONDAY!!

That's all - just a news flash! I am really starting cycling meds on MONDAY!! WOW!! :D I am so EXCITED!! Bring on the lupron! Wow!!

The "Real You" - A Warrior!

Last night at church I attended a women's ministry presentation of The Real You, last night's topic was becoming a prayer warrior. It was a really awesome event and I'm so glad I went!

There has been a lot of turbulence in my life these past couple months. Kenneth deployed in early November, my mom passed away towards the end of November and within a couple weeks as I began rethinking priorities and going through a lot of internal changes after mom's death I began to really struggle with my marriage and relationship with Kenneth. Any one of these things is more than enough of an emotional strain, but all within a month of each other has truly broken me down as a person and I've had to finally fall flat on my face and ask God for guidance and direction and peace in my life. I don't have the answers, I do not feel capable of finding them on my own. I don't know which direction my life will take at this point but I am finding hope and comfort in trusting there IS a plan, even if I don't know what it is and I have chosen to seek Him as I continue to look for answers.

For a long time I have kept to myself on a lot of things that have hurt me, worried me, and made me sad and through my mom's loss I think the reality of just how short life is began to sink in and as that happened I realized just how much in my life there is to change. My focus now is on finding out who I really am, what I need and want in my life, what kind of person I want to be, what kind of mother I want to be, where my priorites need to be and making time for friendships and connections that I've not had for a long time and have been missing so much. I've begun to invest time at church as I've felt the lack of a church family for many years, and am excited to have found a church I want to connect to that has a great children's program that I am praying Kent will eventually be able to really connect with as well. That was such an important part of growing up for me, those friendships and experiences and I am hoping he will be able to discover something amazing through his time with the youth program at our church now too. I have a lot of hope for our future, I am excited to see what will happen this year, what way God will work in our lives and I am trying to just be still and listen and be open to the path He puts us on. Honesty and transparency are the two things I know I really need - being honest with myself is the starting place and I am working on that now.

Talking about prayer last night and establishing that connection with God was a great topic for me. It's something I've lacked in my life as a Christian, but something I need and honestly I realized just how much it helps me to get clarity on what is really important, what is really on my heart. When I open up and begin to pray, listening to the words that tumble out is honestly eye opening... so all of that to say things have been confusing and emotional for me but I have great friends and family and am thankful for them, and I am finding my way, one day at a time.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Fiona is 2 1/2!!

How AMAZING is that??! My sweet surro babe is 2 1/2 years old already! My wonderful FIM "I" called yesterday while Kent and I were at jiu jitsu just to say hi and she wanted to acknowledge that special day (since it was officially yesterday) and let me talk to Fiona for a minute. She has the cutest voice!! :)

"I" called again today and we caught up a little - it's been awhile since she and I spoke so she didn't know Kenneth was deployed or that my mom had passed 2 months ago. While we were talking I got to hear Fiona chattering and singing in the background - SO cute!!

She extended an invitation again to come up for a weekend and I so want to take her up on it! So much depends on this cycle and if we're successful and if transfer actually happens so I couldn't commit to anything, but we will play it by ear and see how things go. It is AWESOME to feel welcome and just to have that invitation, that means so much to me!!

I haven't gotten to see pictures of Fiona in awhile, but "I" was telling me their camera broke and she hasn't decided on repair or replace yet, but maybe I will get to see her in person myself soon enough! :) She is such a cutie, I can only imagine how much she has grown!!

I am so thankful for my FIPs, that they have stayed in touch over the last couple years and continue to make me feel welcome in their lives. What a blessing!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Missing Noah

I think this deserves its own separate post. On January 27, 2006 I had my d&c. I had gotten pregnant within days of an IUD removal and though it was unplanned I was INCREDIBLY excited and happy. I have re-read some of the journal posts I wrote during that first month of the pregnancy and I was ecstatic and had so many hopes and dreams and plans for our little one. We had one eary ultrasound done around 6 weeks to make sure the baby was growing in the right spot, and he looked ok with a heartbeat of about 120 if I remember right which was a little on the low side but they weren't concerned. I went back in around 10 weeks and we did another quick scan. That is when it all came crashing down and I knew something was wrong right away when the tech wouldn't say ANYTHING to me while she was scanning and then she went to get the doctor. The baby was just laying on my cervix and was gone... looked like he had stopped growing around 8 weeks or so... I was so devastated. I remember going to my OB's office to sit and talk with him and just bawling my eyes out. And going to the parking lot and sitting in my car in a daze and bawling some more. The next couple days were a blur, but I remember we scheduled the d&c for very shortly after that ultrasound and I remember waking up after the procedure and wanting to scream that my baby was gone from me now and they'd taken him from me. I know it wasn't their fault and everyone was so good to me, but I just remember waking up and feeling so empty and so lost. I healed physically fairly quickly but I do not think you ever heal emotionally from a loss. Kenneth and I did not handle it well as a couple either and I think it has driven us apart when we should have banded together. We never talked about it. The first time in nearly 4 years that we finally did was last night on the phone. I wish we had leaned on each other instead of carrying the weight of our pain and hurt around alone all these years.

I miss my baby Noah (we don't know that he was a boy but I felt he was from the beginning and his name was Noah Alexander) so much. I miss the little 3 1/2 year old I should have running around my house, and the toys that should be scattered on my floor, and the sounds of his voice and laughter I should get to hear. I miss it all so much more than I can ever fully express in words. A piece of me went with him to heaven and I pray he is with my mom now, that she is watching over him for me. He is my angel baby and I ache for the time I won't ever get to have with him.

I can't believe its been 4 years since that time. It feels like yesterday in some ways and then in others feels like its been an eternity since then. The years have passed quickly.

This is one of those moments where you just want to capture feelings - remind yourself of the past and of the future as well. I ache for what could have been, but I am also very grateful for what I have in my life. For my friends and my family, especially for my son. He is so much a part of me, of who I am, of what I want - he means the world to me. He is my heartbeat and I am so grateful to get to be a mom and to share this life with him.

That quote ‘Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.’ is so beautiful and so true! That is very much how I feel, and it comes with so many ups and downs and joy and sorrow and I wouldn't trade a minute of it!

Sick and tired of being sick and tired!!

It's been a LONG weekend... I started coming down with something on Friday and knew I was going to spend my weekend sick, but I figured I would be feeling better by today. Nope!

Saturday I slept in until it was time to take Kent to jiu jitsu at 9:30 and then came home again for more resting. I felt a little better in the afternoon so we went to see Sherlock Holmes, then I scanned some of my pictures from my childhood albums into the computer and otherwise took it easy some more. Sunday I felt pretty good, got up and went to church and spent most of the afternoon in the Discovery 1 class which is a pre-req for membership but mainly I was interested in learning more about the the church and their history as I think I do want to invest more of my time and energy there and wanted to learn more about them before getting more involved. I am in the process of filling out paperwork to join the Praiseland team which helps with the children birth through pre-k. I have such a heart for children and haven't been able to really find an outlet for that other than through surrogacy and think this will be wonderful to be involved in! I'm excited! I want to sing too, eventually, but this is what was on my heart right now.

I took it pretty easy Sunday afternoon, did more photo scanning. We had today off for MLK Jr. Day, so I got to sleep in again and when I woke up I knew I was not going to have a great day. I felt like crud again. I took my sudafed cough and cold as soon as I got up and have been taking it faithfully every 4 hours trying to keep the congestion in my head to a minimum. I've been drinking fluids and pretty much doing nothing but resting today. We had to run errands this morning - Kent had a 9:30 dentist cleaning, then we picked up a couple items at the store and I had a blood draw. We stopped for lunch out since I've been craving sizzling rice soup ever since coming down with this cold. Then home and into bed I went. Got in bed a little after 12:00 and didn't wake up until after 3:30. From the bed I moved to the couch, armed with a fuzzy blanket, tissues, juice, my pills and my Symphony Bar I picked up at the store. Chocolate is part of every good medicinal protocol!

I've been on the couch all afternoon. And I still feel like crap. My head is aching from the sinus pressure, my nose is all plugged up and I just feel drained and completely exhausted. This is very frustrating! I am most likely going to work tomorrow and just hoping it doesn't set me back further.

I am not sure how much it plays in, but I have a lot of stress right now too in my personal life and I'm sure that isn't helping me heal quickly. I just have to do the best I can to take care of myself and hope this cold decides to hit the road soon so I can get back to my normal energy level! I did some dishes, one load of laundry and vacuumed the living room and kitchen this weekend and that was all I could muster. I am getting so behind! I know I'll catch up eventually, I hate letting things go though when I'm feeling like this... hopefully by next weekend I'll be back to me!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Almost Friday - Yay!

Today was a good day! The weather was pretty nice (it's been FREEZING!) but it was a little warmer today and I didn't have to wear my gloves and scarf for a change. :)

I've been busy at work which makes the day go quickly, but at the same time this week has felt like it was DRAGGING! I am so glad tomorrow is Friday and the weekend is about here! We don't have any big plans, just looking forward to some down time.

Vicki and I had a really good chat this morning that started the day off good, and then we got to meet up for lunch at Einstein's over by my office (yummy!) and I went with her to Jared's appointment for his shot. He is such a CUTE lil punkin!

The rest of the afternoon flew by and I enjoyed my drive home. Kent and I finished up the leftovers for dinner and then I got on the treadmill and put a TV recording on and walked about 3.5 miles. It totally wore me out though, I don't think I've been eating enough protein yet with cutting meat out of my diet and I have been reducing my total food intake anyway so the combination of the two leaves me feeling fairly tired most of the time. I'm working on it. I drank 2 big glasses of water while I walked and since I was feeling pretty woozy when I got off the treadmill I had some peanut butter on an english muffin for a good boost.

We have about a month until our Gatlinburg trip and I have a weight loss goal of about 5-10 more pounds between now and then and the treadmill walking is more for getting my lungs and legs in shape for all the walking we will be doing while we're there. It feels good to get on the treadmill and be active a little! I need to be back in a more regular work out routine anyway with cycling coming back up - I want to be in good shape and have good eating habits established before starting the meds up again since I have a tendancy to gain when I'm on lots of fake hormones if I'm not careful!

Off for a bubble bath and bed!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

An evening with friends! :)

Vicki decided this would be a good evening to get a small group together and head out for dinner at Texas Roadhouse... it was very weird for a couple reasons. January 12th is I believe the date (a year ago) we met with John & Vicki at Texas Roadhouse for dinner to hang out after we'd just matched officially (I need to double check last years blog posts, but I know we did something together on January 12th). And we sat in the same booth that we all sat in a year ago! I got to meet Doug and his girlfriend, I think they are coming to the mountains in February so it was nice to meet him too. Now I know everyone that will be going! I cannot wait for that getaway weekend! :)

In any event, it was really nice just to hang out with friends and laugh pretty much all evening! I am still smiling from having a great time. :) It is nice to feel happy so much lately.

Then I came home and had a piece of homemade pie which I baked last night and am chatting with Vicki - my evening is complete! :D It's been a pretty good day!

I visited Brittany (a surro mom I met through SMO) in the hospital today. She is on bedrest with twins for the next month (YIKES) so I took her some flowers and spent a little time there. It was nice to meet her - makes you realize just how serious a multiple pregnancy can be! Her two singletons were problem free, but her body just isn't handling twins the same at all. I know some do get lucky, but many have so much more difficult a time. I have been nervous about twins since contemplating a second surrogacy pregnancy. I hope if I do get pregnant with twins it will be as complication free as possible - knocking on wood and saying my prayers now! :)

Lupron starts in less than 2 weeks! I need to get in touch with the clinic for a tentative calendar so I have my dosages. I'm actually going to need them soon. Wow! :)

Friday, January 08, 2010

Surrogacy Cycle - Round 2!!

Happy dance time - we have a tentative calendar! It's a MIRACLE!! Feels like an eternity since our last canceled cycle in Sept/Oct. I am so happy that we have a general time frame again and can start counting down.

Lupron starts on January 25th and then the rest depends on my cycle after that, but general (guesstimated) time frame is estrogen around Feb. 8th, IM's meds around Valentine's Day and early March transfer.

John, Vicki a couple of their friends and I had already planned a Gatlinburg snow tubing trip for Feb 18-21st but the clinic and my IM said that should be totally fine and it shouldn't interfere with our schedule at all which was good to hear. Things can change, of course, but it should be ok. I would be bummed if I had to miss out!

I can't believe I get to start injectables in about 2.5 more weeks... WOW!! Oh the joys of fake hormones - bring it on!

Today we had a snow day! We didn't actually get that much snow, but enough of a dusting with cold temperatures to freeze everywhere and make the roads hazardous. So the schools were closed down and there was no way I was risking driving an hour to and from work on the roads so Kent and I were home bound and had a nice day together. He wasn't feeling so hot so he rested and napped quite a bit, and I let him watch some TV in the afternoon.

I spent some time baking a new cookie recipe and then risked a trip out to the grocery store around 2:30 when I figured most of the ice was melted. I slipped down my driveway (which hadn't melted) a little - but it wasn't far and nothing was hurt. The rest of the trip was uneventful and people were being very careful anywhere the road looked wet which was good! I grabbed a few grocery items and made it back home. I fixed "Healing Cabbage Soup" from All Recipes for dinner and it was SO awesomely yummy! Lots of great fresh vegetables (I added more than the recipe called for), and I fixed a grilled cheese sandwich to go with the soup for Kent. He loved it! My often times picky child when it comes to new things loved it. That just made my whole day!

The cookies I baked are awesome too - good thing I made them small, I think I've already had like 5 today... !!! Yikes!! This is why I need to give some away, and soon! :)

Tomorrow night I'm looking forward to fight night at Alpha where Kent trains for jiu jitsu. He on the other hand isn't nearly as excited, but I'm hoping once he goes and sees what its all about he'll look forward to going again. It's amateur so they have a lot of limitations on what they can do, and it's not supposed to be all that violent.

I guess that's it for today! I think I might soak in a tub for a little before putting on some warm pajamas and crashing for the evening. :)

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

My Mother

I wrote this originally to be read at mom's Memorial Service, but I wasn't ready to share it then... but I want to share it now.

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Where do I begin? How could I possibly express in words what my mom has meant to me in my 28 years? To put it simply, my mom is love. She always has been and always will be. She has a HUGE heart and I proudly watched her give of herself, improving the lives of everyone around her simply by being herself and sharing of herself. What a wonderful example she has been in my life!

Everywhere we have lived we have shared her with others who also came to think of her as mom. From a young age we begin learning how special it is to care for others as we watched her and learned from her at Promised Land Shelter, then House of His Creation and Bailie Memorial Youth Ranch and then Dakar Academy. Everywhere we went, she was mom to many and I think in many ways I tried very hard to be just like her and be a “mini-mom”!

When I close my eyes and picture her in my head I get the same image every time. Her face lit with a smile as she giggled and her eyes glinting mischievously. She had such a bright spirit and it just shone from within.

She put up with so much! Jake, Ruth and I were all such different personalities, and mom encouraged each of us to find our own strengths and to grow into our potential. I remember all of the parties she let me hold, never complaining about sleepover nights with a house full of boy crazy silly chatty girls, or the water fight parties where about 20 kids would be running around the yard and house spraying water every which way, she let me plan and organize and be the social butterfly I loved to be. And I remember that smile she had every time she saw us happy, when we were doing what we loved and she knew it, there was this smile that I cannot even describe. It was her “mom” smile, the one that said how proud she was, how much she loved us, and how much she loved to see us happy.

I have so many favorite memories and I have been trying to think of a specific one to share. One of the most important moments we shared that drastically changed my whole life and could have turned out so very differently if her reaction had been other than it was I will never forget. I was 16 and realized that I was probably pregnant. We were about 2 months or so from 11th grade graduation at that point. Fear of the unknown and worry for the future consumed me and I was so scared to talk to my parents. I remember finally sitting down with mom on her bed and somehow getting it all out. She held me and comforted me and reassured me it would all work out and it was going to be ok. There was never any anger or accusation, just loving acceptance and that reassurance that we were a team and we would make it all work. That was just how she was, no problem was ever too big to take to her, her arms were ALWAYS open and her love was truly unconditional.

I have lived my life hoping I have made her proud, hoping that she will approve of my choices, always openly sharing my thoughts, my feelings, my worries, my concerns with her. In fact, in some of our very last e-mail exchanges when I wrote to her about how upset I was the morning I dropped Kenneth off at the airport to head towards Afghanistan on November 9th her response to me was:
“My grandma, who I still miss with an ache I can't describe, always taught me to LET GO ... and LET GOD. It worked for me, I can still see her wise eyes and whacky grin ... to her, faith was so simple. I pray you discover it can be that way for you, firm and dependable, right now when you need it most.”

Her faith and trust always carried her through and I hope and pray she is with her grandma now, seeing that whacky grin in person. Her ache is now my ache as I miss her to my very core and will every day for the rest of my life.

Working through the anger, the pain and the utter devastation of her loss has me wanting her more than ever – she is the one I turn to when I am lost and hurting and the idea that I cannot pick up the phone or send her an e-mail just tears me up inside. She always had the right thing to say, even if it wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear it was what I needed to hear. The saying “You don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone” does not apply in this case. I know exactly how wonderful my mom is, and I know exactly how much I have leaned on her and depending on her throughout my life and my world is so much sadder without her in it now.

One of the many ways she has made my life brighter is during the holidays – she has made each one so special for us for so many years, especially with the distance between us since moving to Georgia. She always put together a holiday gift package for us on each one. Last Valentines was conversation hearts, cute candies and one of my favorite cards from her, one where she recorded her voice saying “Happy Valentines day, we love you…” I often meant to have Kent record one to send back to her and never got around to it… I remember when we were very little, how she made Valentines a special day where we would each get a little gift on our plate at the dinner table. She had that touch, she knew how to make special occasions sparkle, make them memorable and make me strive to do the same for my family even if I have never felt like I get it quite right!

I am so thankful my mom taught me love, and that I have been able to express to her time and again how much she means to me, I am so thankful that our last e-mail was about sugar free pecan pie and that she knew how much I was looking forward to her visit which I will forever long to have had. If I can take anything away from her loss in my life, it is that I do not ever want to live with regrets. I want my family to know how much they mean to me, I want to say I love you every day to those I care about most, I want to be generous with my hugs and kisses and my affection, I want to give freely of my time and self to those who need me. My mom celebrated life and those she loved, she made me feel like a better person just for knowing her. She was a beautiful gift in so many ways and her imprint will be upon my heart forever.

Mom, I think of you every moment of every day. I miss you from the tip of my nose all the way to my toes. You were the light in my life and I just ache with you gone from it now. I will picture you in your Home now, singing and laughing and dancing every day. Truly I don’t blame God for wanting you back and I am just so profoundly grateful for the years He shared you with me. I have always been proud and thankful to have you as my mommy. You are forever loved.

Saturday, January 02, 2010

Happy New Year!

Hope 2010 is an amazing year for everyone! The year started off fantastically with a great get together with good friends. John & Vicki hosted a bonfire for a small group and we toasted marshmallows and hotdogs and welcomed the New Year with lots of laughter! We took a buggy and 2 rock crawlers down to the bonfire pit area, and my favorite part was getting to ride twice back up the hill to the house!! That was AWESOME!! The 1st time I went with Vicki back up to the house for a restroom break and she drove, it was FUN!! The 2nd time was at the very end of the evening when there were just 4 of us left and we took the 4Runner back up - apparently heavier truck and heavier load equals backsliding. We did that twice while the girls screamed for mercy and the backseat driver egged John on!! That was crazy, but still fun, but mostly crazy. :D Thankfully we found a less terrifying route up another direction! It was really nice to hang out and enjoy the fire and teasing and laughter for an evening.

Kent and I took it easy on Friday for the most part, Vicki and I started planning a February weekend getaway and I made a pot of pinto beans (that were freakin' AWESOME) for the first time for dinner. Kent says we ate "country"! He loved them.

Today was more action packed - I woke up and realized we had to leave for jiu jitsu in about an hour and a half and needed to get Kent's uniform washed. I ran down, threw that in, and then ended up on the phone with Kenneth until about 15 minutes before we were supposed to leave. I got the clothes switched to the dryer in time, and then as soon as I hung up with Kenneth I rushed into the shower and hollered at Kent to get the dogs situated and get into his uniform and get the car started. We were about 10 minutes late to class, but he got there! The class size seems to still be very diminished due to the Holidays I am guessing. Not long after we got there I was on the phone with Vicki when she backed into her dog. She wasn't sure how bad she was hurt though because Harley took off into the woods. As soon as Kent was done with jiu jitsu we rushed by the house so he could change, then hopped back in the car and went out to Vicki's. Vicki and I spent nearly 2 hours in about 30 degree weather wandering their woods and calling for Harley and searching the ground, not knowing what had happened or how far she would have gone. We finally gave up a little after 1:00 and went back inside. Johnny went down for a nap and Jared woke up from his not long after.

Vicki and I spent some time looking up cabin rentals and talking some of the details for our mountain trip in February and discussing what I needed to add to my wardrobe to not fall over from hypothermia! I am not cold weather prepared. Once Johnny was up from his nap and Jared had his bottle we headed out around 4:15 and went for late lunch/early dinner at Sumo (a Japanese restaurant). We'd eaten there before not too long ago and had a great dining experience! Not so much this time. The food didn't taste quite right, and by the time we got to Kohls to pick up some cold weather clothes I had to run to restroom to throw up and Vicki's stomach was hurting. Bummer! So much for all the leftovers I brought home! (And it was during our dinner that Vicki got a call from John informing her that Harley had appeared at the house!! TWO HOURS of calling her, and nothing, and she showed up on her own)!!

While at Kohl's I picked up some thermal underwear, a nice warm coat with a zip in (super soft and fuzzy) lining, some warm pajama pants and a pair of ear muffs (and one too cute shirt that could not be denied). I am all set! Now the count down begins! :)

Tomorrow we'll go to church in the morning and then I'll finally take Kent to see Avatar. I was going to take him today but plans changed when we went searching for Harley! I am just glad Harley is ok! Looking forward to one more day off before its back to reality and a full work week! Ack!