Monday, February 28, 2011

Farewell February!

Today is the last day of the 2nd month of the year... already!! How did that happen?? The days are flying by for sure. I am now 1 week shy of being 4 months post partum! Seems like AGES ago since I delivered. I have had the easiest recovery so far and am so happy at how easy it has been to bounce back physically. I've never had a difficult recovery, but this one has absolutely been exceptionally easy on me!

Kenneth got a quick note back from the person he's been in touch with previously regarding the potential job he's interested in for after graduation and they have a class that would start about 1 1/2 weeks after graduation (in late May) which would give him time to travel to the training location and get set up with little down time in between so timing wise that is awesome! I'm so excited for him that he's found something he feels enthusiastic and excited about and will continue to keep my fingers and toes crossed for him. He's hoping to get his Bronco up and running between now and then as he'd like to pull a trailer with his motorcycle on it behind it. If he's not able to get the Bronco road worthy by then he'll probably take the Vette instead. At least he has options! It would be awesome though, if he did get the Bronco ready so I could have the other half of the garage back!! :D He's been having fun working on it recently - he spent quite a bit of time Friday and Saturday in the basement and came back upstairs covered in dirt and grease... lovely! :D I'm glad he has projects to work on that he enjoys though and it's great that Kent is old enough to often be a good helper!

It's a little chilly in my office today and I'm wishing I'd worn something a little warmer! The minute it starts warming up outside I swear they totally crank up the A/C and freeze me! I have to dress warm no matter what time of year it is, it seems.

Tomorrow is my next chiro adjustment and massage and I can't wait!! I always feel so much more relaxed through my shoulders after seeing Vanessa. So glad Spa Qi introduced themselves to our company!

Here's hoping for a peaceful and productive day! I'm already ready to get back home and see my boys and spend some time with them this evening. I have to run a couple errands on the way home as well, so I hope the rest of the morning and this afternoon pass quickly! :)

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Beautiful Sunday!!

What a gorgeous and wonderful day it's been!! The weather is so perfect today. We had a good church service this morning and went home for a little while before we went out and met with new friends for lunch at Jim N Nicks - we haven't been there in a long time so that was a really nice treat!

After lunch we ran a couple errands and then went home, changed and hopped on the Harley for about an hour long ride. What a great day for it! I haven't been on the bike in AGES!! I can't even remember the last time. Kenneth was gone most of the summer of 2009 and then I was pregnant throughout the warmer weather in 2010 so it may have been since 2008? I can't remember for sure, but I know its been quite awhile! In any event, the sun felt great, the wind felt good on my skin and it was gorgeous out there! It was relaxing and a nice way to spend a little of our afternoon together.

We're talking about maybe going for a day trip ride either next weekend or maybe the one after - we've never done that before but I think it would be great! Kenneth has found a bunch of routes online with scenic drives and I would love to follow one of those routes and get to take lots of great pictures and maybe pack a picnic lunch to enjoy along the way!

I need to go clean the bathroom and fold some of the laundry we washed and I will feel like it's been a productive and pretty dang fantastic day!! :)

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Visit with Maggie!

Today we drove to West Georgia to visit Maggie - she's taking some pictures of body imperfections like scars, etc. for a project and we were all subjects for her. She got some awesome pictures of Kent's cute crooked pinkies and some not so great, but real pictures of some of my stretch marks!! Oh well, they are what they are, and I wear them with pride, most of the time!! :)

I am finished with one more week of P90X after finishing Kenpo-X this evening! Yippee! 3 more weeks and I'll be done with the full 90 days and on to something else!

We took L.B. and Sadie to the vet for their annual appointments this morning and they did great, though our great big Rottweiler was a huge wimpering baby when it came to her blood draw and shots... our little chi did great though - I always worry a little about how he'll handle stressful situations like that after all the trauma he's had in his little life! He did very good though. We also walked them around the park for about 15 minutes before their appointment when we had some time to kill - Sadie found the duck and geese VERY fascinating and stopped to stare at them with her ears perked quite a bit as we made our way around the little pond! L.B. was his usual spazzy self and just ran all over the place. He's doing pretty well on a leash though, especially compared to how he acted when we first got him! Can't believe we've had him for 2 years now!!

Hubby is ready for some company on the couch to finish up an episode of Nip Tuck on Netflix, so off I go - hope everyone has a great evening!!

Friday, February 25, 2011


I'm so happy its the weekend!!! Ok, well not QUITE the weekend but just about. I've had a busy and productive work day so far and have gotten lots of little things checked off the "to-do" list!

I've been pretty tired the past couple days, not entirely sure why; I'm hoping some down time this weekend will have me feeling better. I wonder if I'm fighting a little something off since Kenneth has been sick the past week and is just finally feeling better himself! Maybe its because allergy season is beginning and the pollen count seems to be up and my sinuses seem to often be in a state of irritation the past week or two. I can feel it in my ears a little too. I guess I will have to take some claritin and see if it makes a difference. Gotta love Georgia pollen!!

Despite feeling a little tired I am also in a great mood today! Just looking forward, to a nice weekend with my boys and probably with excitement to see what happens next on the surrogacy front. I'm looking forward to getting to know potential IPs and finding out who will be my next and quite possibly last match.

If I haven't already started college by the time this next surrogacy journey ends I know I'll be starting very shortly after and can't imagine wanting to pursue another journey while working towards a nursing degree and most likely home schooling Kent at least at some point in there as well. Not to mention Kenneth will probably be gone quite a bit if he gets the job we think he will! So, at least as of now there seems to be a lot of good reasons to think this could very well be my last surrogacy journey. You never know what the future will hold though! :)

In any event, I'm just looking forward to the next steps and seeing who I might click with and getting to know them better. I was searching posts on SMO yesterday to make a "master list" of questions to discuss with potential IPs and this is what I've come up with so far:

1. What is your age, your spouse's age?
2. If you have a religious or faith belief system, please describe.
3. Describe your home. How long have you lived there?
4. What sort of things do you enjoy doing in your free time?
5. Are you involved in any community activities or groups?
6. Are you married, if so how long have you been married?
7. How would you each describe your personalities?
8. What do you each enjoy most about each other?
9. Do you have any children? How old?
10. Have you been pregnant before; if so what did you like/dislike about your pregnancy? Any concerns based on your own experience that you might have with a surrogacy pregnancy?
11. Do you have any prior experience with surrogacy?
12. Do you enjoy your jobs?
13. Do you have animals?
14. Do either you or your spouse smoke?
15. What are your thoughts on a surrogate carrying your baby, how do you think you will feel?
16. What are your biggest worries about a GS cycle and pregnancy?
17. How do you tend to handle conflict?
18. Does your family know you are planning to work with a GS, what about your friends? What are their thoughts?
19. What brought you to pursue surrogacy as a way to build your family?
20. How long have you wanted to build your family through surrogacy?
21. What are your childcare plans?
22. Do you plan on telling your child(ren) that they were born via a surrogate mother?

1. What is the most important thing to you, as you look for a GS?
2. Do you have any specific requirements?
3. What qualities are you looking for in a prospective GS?
4. How do you feel about your surrogate having pets, any concerns?
5. When are you hoping to start cycling?
6. If the first transfer fails, how soon would you hope to try again?
7. How often do you think you'd like to communicate during the pregnancy, how involved would you like to be?
8. What about your spouse, how involved would he like to be?
9. What sort of contact level do you hope for after birth?
10. Would you be willing to have your surro and her family come visit occasionally during the pregnancy and/or after delivery?
11. Would you be interested in visiting your surro and her family occasionally during the pregnancy and/or after delivery?
12. Do you hope/plan to attend appointments during the pregnancy?
13. If there is distance; would you plan to visit during the pregnancy for any of the appointments? Would you plan to arrive ahead of delivery and attend the birth if possible?
14. Are you open to using the GS’s OB and normal hospital for pregnancy care and delivery?
15. Do you have any specific hopes/plans/expectations for the actual delivery/birthing experience?
16. Would you hope to do a sibling project if everything went well?
17. How many transfers would you like your GS to agree to?
18. Do you plan to be at the transfer?
19. If you need an Egg Donor, do you already have one in mind?
20. Do you have frozen embryos?
21. Would you like your surrogate to use Home Pregnancy Tests after the transfer, or prefer 22. to wait for the beta blood test?
23. How many embryos do you want to transfer? How many babies is the most you would want your GS to be pregnant with?
24. Do you want the option to terminate, if so what would you consider terminating for?
25. Do you want the option to selectively reduce? If so, under what circumstances would you want to s/r?
26. How much testing do you want to do? Do you want to do an amniocentesis or would you prefer less invasive testing, if any at all?
27. Is there anything special (dietary, lifestyle etc.) that you would ask of your GS?
28. What do you think about your surro pumping for and/or breastfeeding your baby? Are you comfortable with either?
29. Would you like breast milk for the baby if your surro was willing to donate it?
30. Would you enjoy taking and sharing photographs? Would you want to take pictures with your surrogate during cycling/transfer/pregnancy/delivery?
31. Would you be comfortable with your surrogate posting about her experiences on a blog and online community? Would you be interested in joining her in a blog or online community?

There are always so many things to discuss!! I think I am much more interested in doing a lot of talking prior to matching than I have been previously. I just don't want to rush into anything at all, and am looking forward to taking my time and getting to know potential IPs before moving forward!

We're getting ready to have "TGIF" here at work - lunch is being provided by the group who organized today! Then just a couple more hours until I can get ready to head home.

Tonight is day 61 of P90X - Legs & Back and Ab Ripper X. I like this workout!! I haven't been able to finish all the way through the last two nights because of interruptions, so I'm looking forward to finishing this one! My legs are always sore but feel good afterwards.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Chatted with Fran and Kent is Home!!

I left work a little early yesterday so I could try to get my workout in before leaving to pick up Kent. They were supposed to be back around 6:00pm. I got home at about 4:00 and got going on my workout - shoulders and arms today, lots of weights! I got about a half hour into it and the phone rang. Fran from the agency I am signed up with had called to chat and go over the application I'd submitted that morning and discuss some potential couples she has searching right now.

Everything in my application looked fine to her, though I thought it was sort of funny that she did mention she took out the number of dogs we had - I listed that we have 5 rescue dogs in there and she said that might weird some people out so she changed it to just say dogs instead of how many. I don't mind her changing it, but at the same time we DO have 5 dogs and if IPs wouldn't want to work with me because of that I don't see why we shouldn't tell them up front... I'm sure it will come up in any initial conversation I have with potential IPs though, so I'm not worried about it!

I think I'm excited to have some potential conversations lined up sometime next week, but also nervous again. This last journey was picture perfect when it comes to cycling and how I responded to meds. My body did EXACTLY what it should have and I was SO over the moon happy about that! And now all the "what ifs" are creeping back in and I worry yet again about what if this time my body is uncooperative, what if I don't respond to the protocol the way I should, what if my lining doesn't thicken up correctly? Will I mess up my IPs cycle if its fresh? I don't want to be responsible for that...! So, I know I just need to make sure IPs know about my cycle history and that any RE we work with also knows and then continue to keep fingers and toes crossed that we'll have a repeat of this last journey and not the lining issues I had several times with my first IPs! I hated that for them SO much, I felt SO much guilt. Thank God we were able to finally move forward with transfer and I did get pregnant for them, it was the saving grace of it all, but I still have a lot of guilty feelings for all the extra expense they went through because of me... Things were so different the second time with L&N, no extra expense, no poor responses, no super ridiculous high meds expenses trying different protocols, just a simple straight forward estrace protocol and a normal response and pregnant with the first transfer! I can't really wrap my head around it and will never understand the "whys" of things. But I am grateful that I know I can have a normal cycle, normal lining, and I can obviously get pregnant with IVF transfers and I will just choose to remain positive and trust when I find the right match and we move forward things WILL go well for us!!

After I talked with Fran for nearly an hour it was time to go pick Kent up. I was SO happy to see him! He wasn't ready to be home at all, he had a fantastic time and was in a great mood. I loved hearing all about the things they saw, learned and did while they were there. There was so much enthusiasm and happiness in his voice. I live for those moments and love that he had such a good time!! Wish I could send him to camp for fun adventures every week! :D Of course, then it wouldn't exactly be special. He's already really looking forward to the opportunity to go next year and said lots of Thank Yous last night. :) We'll see how long it takes him before he slips back into normal moody pre-teen mode!!

Hoping today is peaceful and quiet and looking forward to the weekend which seems just around the corner. I've been so tired the past couple days, I'm just ready for a little down time...!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

First GS Journey Flashbacks...

I was just going through photobucket and cleaning it up; my "surrogacy" folder has morphed into a catch-all and I wanted to pull out all my GSx1 pictures into its own separate album and of course was loving all the fond memories as I went through the pictures.

So join me in a walk down memory lane.... it all started back in 2006...

3.14.06 - Faxed application to Fran at A Woman's Gift

3.22.06 - Had phone interview with Fran
3.25.06 - Had initial teleconference with T&I
4.18.06 - 4 Preliminary cultures taken
4.27.06 - Culture results from OB came back
5.11.06 - Fly to NJ, meet Tom & Irena and Fran, have sono-hysterogram and labs at Cooper Clinic
5.12.06 - Pyschology Appointment, fly back to Atlanta
5.16.06 - Most labs back, all clear
5.17.06 - Faxed background check authorizations to Fran
5.22.06 - Background checks came back clear
5.23.06 - Spoke to Fran for 2 hours going over preliminary contract questionnaire
5.26.06 - E-mail from IF says we're "Good to go"!
6.12.06 - Signed contract

6.25.06 - Started cycle meds

June 2006 - "A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes" - dreaming of transferring soon with Tom & Irena!

A drawer full of syringes, needles and meds (aka my "Junkie Drawer")!

We had a canceled cycle in July due to my lining not responding correctly (I had fluid) followed by a couple months of additional tests/mock cycle and 1 additional canceled cycle in September, and then we cycled again in late October with an early November transfer and...

11-10-06 7dp3dt and 11-11-06 8dp3dt BFPs!

11-29-06 6 weeks pregnant and oh joy a reaction to the vivelle dot patches!

12-6-06 7 weeks pregnant and our first ultrasound!

12-26-06 9w6d and Merry Christmas!

1-24-07 14 weeks along!

1-25-07 Ultrasound!

2-14-07 Happy Valentines Day! 17 Weeks pregnant!

3-7-07 we reached the half-way mark! 20 weeks today!

 3-8-07 Our 20w1d Ultrasound and we found out Tom & Irena are expecting a GIRL!!

3-28-07 23 weeks along now!

4-5-07 Super cute 3-D image of Miss Munchkin snuggling her umbilical cord:

4-25-07 27 weeks!

5-16-07 30 weeks! Time is flying by!

5-30-07 32 weeks and an ultrasound - super cute close up of her face!! Love this one!

6-13-07 34 weeks and 6-16-07 34w3d swollen feet!!

6-24-07 35w4d "Artistic" Belly pictures - a surro friend took a couple pictures my son helped me take and touched them up!

6-27-07 36 week adorable ultrasound picture!

7-18-07 39 weeks pregnant!!

One of my VERY favorite pictures of Fiona and her mommy!

Me and my kiddo in the hospital bed:
Some of the pictures I've received over the years, getting to watch Fiona grow up!

I am SO blessed and thankful to my IPs for the updates over the last few years; I think she is just so gorgeous and am SO proud that I got to be a small part of her beginnings. I cannot believe that she'll be FOUR this July!! Where does the time go?

Amazing to think of all the time, love and energy that can be summed up in this little amazing person!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Decisions, decisions... think I'm going to look into a new match!

Hubby and I have been talking a LOT the last 3 months about the "what's next" for us and there are a lot of potential changes for our family this year. All this week I have really felt the need to DECIDE one way or the other about whether or not we are going to seriously consider trying for our own child or be at peace with not having any more children and move on from that and focus on everything else the year will bring us. I think I have finally decided the right thing to do for our family is to be content with it the way we are. It has been a hard decision, and a long time coming, but I feel in my heart that it is the right thing for us. With Kenneth graduating in May the job he really wants to take will most likely have him gone a lot over the next year plus and I really want to start college in the next year and after graduating puruse a nursing career, and I am choosing those things and I am excited for all of those opportunities and changes! We wouldn't have been able to do them all if we did decide to have another child, and even if we were able to do some of it, it would have pushed timelines back and made school more difficult, etc. In any event, I am finally at peace and not feeling tormented with the back and forth "what ifs" that I've been running through in my head for the past few months! It feels good to just have DECIDED and be able to move forward and actually plan now!

So, with that decision made I AM going to pursue one more GS journey! Timing wise we'll have to see if I will go ahead and enroll in school during the journey/pregnancy depending on how it all goes or if I'll start school after. That all largely depends on how things are going with Kenneth's new job as well, which we'll know more about closer to graduation. He's going to send an e-mail today to the contact he has to touch base and make sure the job is still there for him upon graduation which will be good, just to make sure we're not making tentative plans for something that's not a viable option any more!

I have contacted my old agency and am looking forward to hearing back to see if she's interested in working with me again. If so, I will hopefully be getting her an updated application this week and then beginning the exciting and nerve wracking process of looking for a great match!

I am going to be pickier this time, so I anticipate it might take a little longer to match. Through my very different surrogacy experiences I've had, I've come to learn a lot about myself and what is important to me in a match. My very first journey I didn't feel like I had the "right" to expect anything of my IPs, but I was truly blessed with a match that was PERFECT for me - we were all a great team, their personalities and communication were exactly what I wanted and needed especially as a first timer. My second journey I just sort of expected to be similar, that I would find a match that was what I was looking for without having to work at it, and I matched quickly but began to realize over time that I did have certain hopes and expectations, and they weren't being met and I could have been more careful about making sure the IPs I worked with wanted the same things I did out of a match and relationship. So, I'm determined to do that this time. Really take my time, have a lot of communication and make sure I'm very up front about my hopes and expectations so that any potential IPs will know from just looking at my profile if we're going into this on the same page. I have learned I do have a right to my desires and my hopes, it's not just about connecting with a couple and having a baby for them, for me it is much more than that and that is ok - it is about the relationship, the communication, the contact - all pieces of the puzzle and I want very much to work with IPs who are interested in a good relationship and a high level of contact and communication as I am. I have felt guilty for wanting a friendship and relationship, feeling like that is being unreasonable and too demanding an expectation. And perhaps some might see it that way, but I've come to the conclusion that there are IPs out there who probably want the same things I do, and when I find them we will have the chance at a good relationship and a great level of communication and we'll both have the chance to get what we want from a match!

So, I'm excited to have finally decided, and hopeful to be in touch with some potential IPs in the next couple months. We'll see how it goes!

On the non-surrogacy front I am starting Phase 3 of P90X tonight! Yippee!! I think this is the farthest I've stuck it out of the other times I've done P90X and I'm proud of myself! I've missed 2 workouts each of the last 2 weeks because of being sick, but I know I'm stronger and have lost weight and can see small changes and I know it will be so worth it to stick with it for the final 30 days and see how I feel and look at the end! Then I have to decide if I want to do another round of P90X or try another program, but I have about a month to decide on that! :)

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day!

Valentine's was another day of feeling pretty under the weather for me and the whole weekend went far from planned. I procrastinated and hadn't done my Valentine's shopping yet, so I didn't even have a card to give hubby on V-day. I am going to make it up to him tonight since I'm somewhat mobile again and back at work; I am going to stop off and get the fixings to make him a nice steak dinner tonight for a belated Valentine's Day special dinner. He had an adorable card for me though and beautiful ruby and pearl jackets to go on the diamond studs he bought me a couple years ago. They are beautiful! He is VERY sweet and spoils me rotten when it comes to jewelry. I complain sometimes that he's not as creative and romantic as I would like, but he sure does know how to buy jewelry so I know I really shouldn't complain! I have told him before, I don't really want or need anything expensive - I would rather have a little creativity and romance, but I think he likes to stick to what he knows best! :D So I have a very nice jewelry wardrobe instead - I need to get my 2nd earring holes re-pierced so I can move the diamond studs up and wear the other earrings he's gotten me over the years more often!

I am on the mend, slowly but surely. Still not feeling all that great. We ended up spending hours at the Urgent Care on Sunday afternoon and finally got seen and told it was a Sinus Infection and given a prescription for antibiotics, cough medicine and a decongestant. The cough medicine and decongestant work GREAT but cause me to be very, very loopy - so I cannot take them and drive which means I am feeling my symptoms more today than I was yesterday since I decided to come to work today whereas yesterday I stayed on the couch and was able to just be loopy! :)

I am looking forward to taking meds when I get home and getting rid of this awful pressure in my ears from the congestion.

I am very tired and would love a nap... I think I might head home early after my 12:45 Spa Qi appointment; I am very much looking forward to that massage! I seriously might fall asleep this time with how out of it I already am.

I missed 2 of my P90X workouts last week because of how sick I've been feeling and I missed Monday's, but I am determined to do Monday's tonight and just be a day off the whole week but try to get them all in. I'm on the last Week of Phase 2 and I don't want to mess it up any more than I already have... being sick just throws a wrench in everything!

Kenneth and I are still talking through baby decisions. Whether or not to move forward with another GS or to try for our own. I would really like to have one more of our own, but don't want to force him into anything he's not fully on board with and he's so logical about everything I think it's a lot harder for him to just "want" something and that be a good enough reason. I hope we can come to a resolution, either way, within the next month or two just so I can plan for the "what's next"! There are so many other variables in the coming year, it would be nice to have one thing I know I could plan towards one way or another.

I cannot wait for the next month and half to pass and for Kenneth to decide if he's going to put in for that great job! I am excited for him to be so close to graduation and be able to move on towards a career he will be excited about! Keeping my fingers and toes crossed that it will all work out great!

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Made Me Smile...! :)

I am awake at 3:00am and feeling cruddy - I came down with some nastiness on Friday and did not get out of bed until about 5:00pm yesterday, was up for a couple hours and then back to bed a little after 9:00pm. So I got a LOT of sleep and knew I wouldn't sleep well through the night. I am awake, still feeling sleepy but not sure I can actually go back to sleep.

My throat is killing me and is thick with mucous drainage. My stomach is churning, probably from all the drainage. I didn't eat much yesterday, but everything I did eat seemed to really upset my stomach. I hope today is at least a little better...

In any event, I came out to the computer and was working on some budgeting stuff from last year and decided to hop on Facebook and peek in on my FIM's page and I found pictures of my surrobabe! They made me smile from ear to ear! I haven't seen any pictures since we said good-bye at the hospital (3 months and a week ago already!!) so that totally made my day. :) She is adorable and I'm so glad I was able to see how she's been growing. :)

So, I guess even if I have another cruddy day and spend it in bed all day again, at least I had a great start to it and sweet pictures that bring me a smile that I can take a look at for a little pick me up today. :)

Ok, off to see if I can get some more sleep... fingers crossed...!

Friday, February 04, 2011

Quick Check In!! :)

What's new in my world... Well, not too much out of the norm here, which I tend to think is a good thing! :) I am almost through with Week 6 of P90X and pretty happy with the results so far. I've lost around 7lbs since starting, lost inches and gained muscle. I am a lot stronger already than I was when I started, but boy I sure have a long way to go!! I am feeling more confident and feel good about myself. I have been eating really well lately, really focusing on healthy foods and keeping a high amount of fresh fruits and veggies in my daily diet. I have also cut meat out of my diet once again.

I tried to be a vegetarian about a year ago and stocked up on Morningstar products, but once I got pregnant that all went on the back burner. I didn't have the foundation I needed to stick with it and there was a LOT going on in my life at the time. This time I am in a much better place and feel very good about that decision and have a much better grasp on my nutritional needs and how to eat healthy with or without meat. I am sticking with the title "flexitarian" because I probably will still eat seafood on occasion. But overall, I don't particularly care for titles; I'm just doing what feels right for me. I am making a point to not change how I cook for Kenneth and Kent though, and just leave meat separate so I can add it into theirs and leave it off of mine. It's been working well so far. Kent tried portobello cheeseburgers with me the other night and sadly wasn't too impressed but I have to admit though I thought mine was very tasty it wasn't NEARLY as good as the ones I crave from Cafe Sunflower in Atlanta! Plus I fixed his like a "regular" hamburger and I don't think it had the right effect. Oh well, live and learn. At least he's somewhat curious about it all and will at least hopefully understand that you don't HAVE to have meat every day (or at all) to have a well balanced, tasty and nutritious diet.

Today I'm trying out Gardein's Tuscan "Chicken" Breasts and saw some good reviews on them so I'm looking forward to tasting them! It's about lunch time, so that will be soon! :) I had some Veggie Patch Chik'n Nuggets the other day that were fantastic!! They would have been SO good smothered in some yummy BBQ sauce! There are so many great faux meat products out there, I know it won't be hard for me at all to feel satisfied while I'm transitioning to this new to me way of eating (again). :)

I've been reading lots of cookbooks for ideas as well, borrowing them from the library and saving my favorite ideas into my AllRecipes online Cook Book which is such a great tool!

Kenneth and I are still going back and forth on whether or not to consider trying for one more little one of our own or not. It's such a big decision and we both go back and forth on it! We've been talking about it a LOT lately! There are so many emotional reasons I want to have one more and I get excited when I think about it, and then part of me that wonders if I'm crazy?! Wanting to start over when I already have a 12 year old, when I want to start school next year, when Kenneth is just looking to get settled into a new career after graduation in May and if we have a child it will heavily influence the type of job he pursues. If we do decide to have one, it might mean him passing up a job that he would most likely LOVE and would pay very well but would mean a lot of travel and he wants to be home and involved if we have another baby... Sigh... decisions, decisions...!! I wish I could just genuinely feel POSITIVE one way or the other, this going back and forth in my head thing is making me crazy(er). :)

Aside from that huge life decision, things are relatively calm and peaceful at our house lately! The weather has been cold and wet and I'm so ready for some sunshine and warmth again. I live in my coat ALL day at work every day... brrrrrrrr....!!